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This is a dump of the strings in memory for the the adventure mode in Carmageddon TDR 2000. Invalid characters have been removed, and line breaks have been added where appropriate. These are all copy-pasted, so the typos present here are present in the game.

Eagle
This is the headquarters of the renouned Heroes of the Console, Torus Games and affiliated companies!
Torus HQ
This is the hallowed orifice of our esteemed leader, William McIntosh III.
Bill's Office
There appears to be little reason to be in this room...
Nondescript Room
Torus Hardware
Torus Hardware.  You thought this place was a mere myth.  But here you are - INSIDE!!  Cutting-edge hardware for your home pc, right in front of your very eyes!
The hall is vast and magnificent, and you wonder how it could possibly be the same size as the other locations on this rigidly grid-shaped map.
Mansion Hall
The study is musty and old, and your car seems a little out of place here.
Mansion Study
The view from the top of the cliff is majestic, punctuated by the screams of the many half-dead people at the bottom.
Cliff
The grove is actually more like a clearing, in that it is a clearing.
Grove
This section of the forest is remarkably similar to the many other forest sections in the region.
The area exudes a refreshingly pungent odour of rotting flesh.
Side Road
You are now thoroughly sick of the sight of the DAMN ROAD!!
The mansion towers before you.  It has several towers.  The towers tower before you.  The towers have several towers.  The towers' towers tower before you.  PLUS!  It looks.. HAUNTED.
Mansion Entrance
The path winds up a hill to..MANIAC MANSION!
Path
The clearing provides a path between the forest and the path leading up the hill.
The forest is completely devoid of clearing, quite contrary to its clearial counterpart to the west.
Forest
The clearing is completely devoid of trees, quite contrary to its forestial counterpart to the east.
Clearing
The sidewalk runs parallel to the main road of the city.  It is made of concrete.
Sidewalk
The road is made of hard asphalt.
Main Road
Panage Kontos
Surely we can get more fps from a genetic algorithm!
Michael Abbot
Ivan the Terrible
Paul Clarke
Wayne Simmons
Tyshan Carey
Tom Le
Stuart Rogers
Steve White
Simon Short
Sharyn de Vries
Ross McRae
Peter Suwara
Pam McIntosh
Michael Solomons
Michael Smith
Matt Ellison
Software is fixed in the latest build.  Get friggin' latest.
Martin Klusacek
Mark Wayland
Mark Day
Marcus Mestrov
Luke Ryan
Let's play some Tekken.
Krysztof Stankiewicz
Don't worry, we'll have TDR2000 finished on it's deadline!
Kevin McIntosh
Joe Tabor
Jeremy Geddes
Grant Davies
David Todd
David Gaunt
Damien Holder
Chris Wise
Chris Hancock
Chris Brown
Bill McIntosh
Get latest.
Andrew Scott
Hey, lets play CounterStrike!
An upstanding employee of Torus Games.
Andrew McIntosh
Sammy the Zombie
I'm not really a Zombie, honest!  Oh God, please dont kill me!!
Rob the Zombie
Zed the Zombie
Zag the Zombie
Zig the Zombie
Zorro the Zombie
<groan>!
Zach the Zombie
<moan>!
Nelly the Zombie
Grrrrrrrrr!
Ned the Zombie
Braiiiiins!
A Zombie, KILL IT!!.
Fred the Zombie
What would you like to buy today?
Harry the-most-ridiculously-long-name-in-the-world-Harvey the Shopkeeper keeps shop.
Dick the-most-ridiculously-long-name-in-the-world the Shopkeeper
Out of my way, I am here to takeover the WORRRRLD!!  (In my High Ute).  Hurry up and cross the road, foolish pedestrians, you might get run over.
High Ute Man is almost your everyday evil villian.
High Ute Man
Hey Kiddo!  With my help, your code can achieve MAXIMUM INEFFICIENCY!!  You haven't seen my arch-nemesis QUICK SORT around here have you?
Sequential Sort is almost your everyday action hero.
Sequential Sort
You shall not progress past this point unless you bring me 10 corpses.
The Black Knight looks a fearsome opponent.
Black Knight
How 'bout some, big boy?
Electra provides services for cash.  It looks as if she thinks you could do with some service.
Electra
Spare a dime, sonny?
Bob the Begger looks a little worse for wear these days.
Old Bob the Beggar
A 3d Card, designed by Torus Engineering, capable of performing more operations per second than a dodgy surgeon.
Torus 3D Card
This is a contract for Carmageddon 18 waiting for your signature..
contract
The painting is of little worth: it is a Turner.
painting
The carpet is very dusty and you contract asthma as a result of your endeavours.
carpet
The pen is useful for such various activities as calligraphy, vandalism and ritual self-mutilation.
pen
The desk makes a stylish accessory for the modern career maniac.
desk
Your ridiculous attempts to examine the cliff-face nearly result in you tumbling to an ignominious death.
cliff
You look like you've seen a corpse.
corpse
What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a haunted mansion on top of a hill with a winding dirt path on it before?
mansion
The dirt path winds its way up a hill, ending abruptly outside a mansion.
path
The hill is steep.  There is a winding dirt path on it.  It leads to a shuckalucken mansion!
hill
A forest is, in lamens terms, a collection of densely packed trees.
forest
I think you have lost sight of the forest, for the trees.
trees
You study the tree.  It offers no solution to your problem of slaughtering peds.
tree
You watch the grass grow.  This is about as exciting as watching paint dry.
grass
It's dust.  Not magic or anything.  Or made of gold.  In short, it sucks.
dust
The sidewalk earns its position by being relative to the road.
sidewalk
The road has the look of a once bustling highway.
road
Behold, Carmageddon City.  Bring us your wicked, your evil, your damaged.  Somewhere inside lies Torus HQ.
city
quit
exit
exits
weather
car
fps
burn
sign
search
about
help
speak
give
kill
runover
inv
inventory
move
unding
drop
ding
take
get
examine
look
status
drive
go
getting silly
top of the morning
low midnight (<- Michael wrote this one)
high noon
night
late afternoon
ON FIRE
noon
mid-morning
hi mum
dawn, daybreak, you know, the end of a day or the start of a new one, or both
dusk
are you still playing this?
mid-afternoon
morning
midday
midnight
early morning
sleeting
on fire
overcast
sunny
raining bits of cats and dogs
stale in this car
eerily quiet
foggy
windy
snowing
hailing
heavily raining
fine
NorthWest
West
SouthWest
South
SouthEast
East
NorthEast
North
Carmageddon 3: The Dingable Shuckalucken Text Adventure!
GoNorth(tm) Studios
New entering mission: Land of Boronia
Welcome to %s!
P R E S E N T
%s
You are in the %s.  
%sNorthWest%s%s.  
%sWest%s%s.  
%sSouthWest%s%s.  
%sSouth%s%s.  
%sSouthEast%s%s.  
%sEast%s%s.  
%sNorthEast%s%s.  
%sNorth%s%s.  
To the 
, you can see the 
%s  
You are now running at %d fps.
 - %s
 The following people are here:
You are on foot.
You are in a %s.
It is %s.
It is now %s.
>%s
go southwest
sw
go southeast
se
go northwest
nw
go northeast
ne
go west
go south
s
go east
e
go north
n
Would you like to play again? (y/n)
How do I %s?
You do nothing.  Time passes.  You'll never get that time back.  An inch of gold can not buy an inch of time.  YOU HEAR ME?!  Oh that it could!  OH THAT IT COULD!!  The amount of time I'd buy back.. well.. 46.4 minutes.
You have %d / %d hit points.
You are not carrying anything.
- %s
You are carrying these objects:
!!!FIXME: TO DO: <Insert help text here!!!>
I cannot go %s!
How does one find %s?
Your desperate attempts to steer through the door land you a date with the door frame.
Wow, the mansion door is small!  It's going to be hard to make it through this gap!  You'll need at LEAST 50 fps to make it through here!!
south
You may not pass until you give me %d corpses
You may now pass to the East
I want no more of your stinking corpses
%s"
%s says: "
Drive where?!
You found nothing in your search.
You cannot see the %s here.
You can see nothing special.
You can see a %s.  
What should I examine?
Move what?!
I cannot see the %s here.
%s does not look like he wants to be moved.
I'm dingin' the %s, but it's not friggin' moving!
Moving the %s has no effect.
You found a Secret Passage to the South behind the painting!  How will you get your car through there?
What should I get?
There is no dingable %s here.
I'm dingin' the %s, but it's not friggin moving!
No room in inventory to ding the friggin' %s.
You've dinged the %s.
%s does not like you stealing his hardware.
What should I take?
What should I drop?
You are not carrying any undingable %s.
The %s is not undingable.
This location cannot hold anymore %s!
You've undinged the %s.
What should I friggin' unding?
Who should I runover?
I cannot see %s here.
You attempt to ding %s, but he swiftly evades!
You ding %s for %d points of damage!
%s %s
has been taken to the liiiine, baby!
is starting to unravel now!
has been whipped like an animal in a friggin' cage!!
has lost a limb.
is bleeding badly.
is slightly wounded.
Who should I kill?
Give what to who?!
Give %s to who?
You do not own the %s.
%s is not here.
%s accepts the %s.
to
You talk to no one.  That's a sign of impending insanity, you know.  You shouldn't be playing this game unless you're FULLY INSANE, MAN!!  iNs4Ne in the friggin' M3mbr4ne!!!  YEH!!!  BAAMM!!
%s speaks, "%s"
"Carmageddon: TDR2000" was hastily cobbled together by Grant Davies and Michael Smith, using the GoNorth(tm)(R)(C) Adventure System Engine Module.
This program conforms to no licence agreement, and may be ruthlessly plundered at will.
(tm)(R)(C) all trademarks are the property of the respective owners.
How do I sign the %s?
After having signed your contract for Carmageddon 18, you read the fine print, and find that you have 10 days to produce the goods. You put the foot to the floor and drive off into the sunset.
How do I burn the %s?
You burn the contract. The contract is ON FIIIIRE!!
Thankyou for playing "Carmageddon: TDR2000".
YOU LOSE!!! LOSER!!
YOU WIN!!!
*** INSTANT REPLAY ***
======================
LET'S SEE THAT AGAIN!!!
%s has entered the %s.
%s has left the %s.
but misses.
and hits for %d points of damage.
but the car absorbed all the damage.
%s attacks you, 
Your %s has been wasted!
BAAM!! You are wasted!

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